it was straight out of a saturday night live sketch. the score was in the negative numbers, and the contestant had a beard. however, this was not darrell hammond pretending to be sean connery. it was cnn’s own wolf blitzer, host of cnn’s ‘the situation room,’ making celebrity jeopardy history.
it was a sheer massacre! blitzer stood behind a blood red, four-digit, negative number while he beaten by dana delany and soundly trounced by one of the most deceptively clever people in entertainment – comedian andy richter of ‘tonight show with conan o’brien‘ fame.
it was fabulous. richter ended double jeopardy with $39,000!!! meanwhile, blitzer had a lowly -$4,600. at one point, they even stopped the game to rule against bliltzer and take additional money away from him because host alex trebek mistakenly gave him credit for a slightly incorrect answer. (blitzer said ‘juila childs’ (with an ‘s’) instead of julia child.) additionally, blitzer betrayed his lack of middle-east and biblical knowledge when he questioned an answer in the category of ‘e times 3’ (each answer was a word with three e’s in it) of ‘this town was the home of david and jesus.’ blitzer offered: ‘jerusalem.’ (the answer, of course, was bethlehem.)
towards the end, i began to feel bad for wolf blitzer. but my pity was quickly tempered by my amazement with andy richter and my non-stop laughter from yelling old darrell hammond/sean connery lines from snl’s celebrity jeopardy.
- ‘only on account of villany!’
- ‘i’ll take swords for 200.’
- ‘oh rough. just the way your mother likes it trebek.’
- ‘i’ll take ‘the penis mightier’ for $200′
- ‘you’ll rue the day you crossed me, trebek,’
- ‘oh, i’ll bet you do, trebek.’
- ‘terd ferguson.’
- ‘jap anus relations.’
- ‘the pen was too heavy.’
- ‘suck on it trebek. suck it long and suck it hard.’
- ‘the day is mine!’
- ‘states that end in hampshire.’
it was pure comedy, and one of the best episodes of jeopardy i’ve ever seen. it was a colossal fail for blitzer, and offered yet another reason not to believe almost anything he says on ‘the situation room.’
Filed under: humor, i'm not making this up, robert cargill, tv Tagged: | alex trebek, andy richter, celebrity, cnn, conan o'brien, dana delany, darrell hammond, fail, jeopardy, saturday night live, sean connery, situation room, snl, tonight show, wolf blitzer