what to name your next child

God's Gift AchiuwaMeet God’s gift to basketball: God’s Gift Achiuwa. That’s his name: “God’s Gift Achiuwa.” And just like all of God’s gifts, he can dunk!

I guess it’s not unlike some other divinely-inspired names like Benyamin Netanyahu (“God has given the son of his right hand”) or Mahershalalhashbaz Ali (“Quickly Spoil becomes plunder” or something likened unto that, cf. Isa 8:1-4), or World B. Free.

I wish him the best. If his play can back up the national attention his name has brought him, perhaps the NBA can bestow upon him some of its gifts (read: ca$h!). But hopefully he’ll avoid the kinds of gifts that got USC into trouble.

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