so here’s my problem with nonsensical charismatic / pentecostal worship

Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him. (Prov. 22:15)

unless, of course, the child’s parents and the church authorities are fools as well, in which case, they have no rod. (they’re welcome to borrow some of mine. there’s plenty.)

i don’t know whether to laugh directly at this kid because this is funny, or be angry with his parents and that church’s leaders for allowing this ridiculous nonsense. the child is obviously emulating what he sees on a sunday morning, which gives me even less comfort. i do not see the value in a style of preaching that is little more than a cheerleader screaming theological palaver in a metered cadence.

seriously, what is this? how is this in any way beneficial, worthwhile, or even spiritual? at least someone had the sense to subtitle it with equally ridiculous, phonetically correct subtitles. allowing children to do childish things in an otherwise sacred setting simply because some think it’s ‘cute’ is sheer stupidity. it reveals the foolish nature of the child’s parents and the church’s leaders. it is sheer and utter nonsense. the parents should be embarrassed and the church’s pastor should be canned.

then again, when church is little more than a pep rally, what can you expect?

i’m a fairly smart guy, but i fail to grasp the purpose and value of dancing like a nut in church. church is not jazzercise. seriously, join a gym. if you’re going to jump around like a jackrabbit that’s gotta pee, at least call it what it is: a show. seriously, get a band and some music and sell some tickets. because that’s what it is.

at least someone had the sense to dub some heavy metal over this nonsense. seriously, when church becomes the place to go for a weekly pick-me-up, both church and parishioner have failed. i suggest you leave that congregation, visit a starbucks to get your shot of espresso, and re-examine your life.

(HT:Jim West)

how to worship (or at least look like you are)

this is an instant classic! it is perhaps the best parody instructional video on emoti-worship i’ve ever seen.

seriously, now you know why i do not clap, raise my hands, or make the ‘going poo’ faces in worship. i’m busy thinking about what is being said and how i can incorporate it into my life. i’m all for rocking out, but i don’t feel compelled to act out the words of the songs i sing. we are not in an early 80’s mtv music video when we’re in church. i’m especially opposed to those who order me to ‘stand up’ in the middle of a song or look at me funny (like i’m not really into the song) when i don’t clap at all as loud as they are.

i’ll make you a deal: i’ll start standing up when we sing ‘we stand up’ and raising my hands when we sing ‘we lift our hands’ when the rest of you get on the floor and start bowing every time we sing ‘we bow down.’ deal?

if you want to express yourself in worship, fine. but don’t expect me to join in the interpretative dance. people worship in different ways. no one is better than the other. my style happens to be one involving cerebral reflection and intellectual consideration of the words being said. i do feel emotion, but i don’t feel others need to see it in order for it to be real.

anywho, check out the video.

(with thanx to jim west and stephen smuts)

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