Discovered on my U Iowa office door this morning, the day before my 40th birthday

I arrived at my University of Iowa Jefferson Building (JB) office this morning (the day before my 40th birthday), and discovered this taped to my door.

It is supposedly the text of “1JB40Car (the Tye-Dye Scroll)”, a newly-discovered Dead Sea Scroll.  It purports to be a list of things I’ve said during various classes at Iowa (with the most incriminating words conveniently lost to lacunae :).

Much of it appears to be corroborated by a textual congruency with a particular Twitter site, which I’m guessing was authored by the same students.

Anyways, I can neither confirm nor deny the accuracy of the statements below.

But I CAN say that I love teaching, I love my students, I love the University of Iowa!

Thanks guys!

(And NO, I shan’t be supplying the missing words…)

The text of 1JB40Car (the Tye-Dye Scroll), discovered posted on my University of Iowa Jefferson Building (JB) office door the day before my 40th birthday. It is a list of things I've apparently said during class (with the most incriminating words conveniently lost to lacunae :)

The text of 1JB40Car (the Tye-Dye Scroll), discovered posted on my University of Iowa Jefferson Building (JB) office door the day before my 40th birthday. It is a list of things I’ve apparently said during class (with the most incriminating words conveniently lost to lacunae :)

The text of 1JB40Car (the Tye-Dye Scroll), discovered posted on my University of Iowa Jefferson Building (JB) office door the day before my 40th birthday. It is a list of things I've apparently said during class (with the most incriminating words conveniently lost to lacunae :)

The text of 1JB40Car (the Tye-Dye Scroll), discovered posted on my University of Iowa Jefferson Building (JB) office door the day before my 40th birthday. It is a list of things I’ve apparently said during class (with the most incriminating words conveniently lost to lacunae :)

The top half of 1JB40Car (the Tye-Dye Scroll), discovered posted on my U Iowa Jefferson Building (JB) office door the day before my 40th birthday. It is a list of things I've apparently said during class (with the most incriminating words conveniently lost to lacunae :)

The top half of 1JB40Car (the Tye-Dye Scroll).

The top half of 1JB40Car (the Tye-Dye Scroll), discovered posted on my U Iowa Jefferson Building (JB) office door the day before my 40th birthday. It is a list of things I've apparently said during class (with the most incriminating words conveniently lost to lacunae :)

The bottom half of 1JB40Car (the Tye-Dye Scroll).

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